A Third Option
A Sermon for the Fourth Sunday of Advent
December 18, 2022
The Rev. Robin Teasley
Now the birth of Jesus the Messiah took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been engaged to Joseph, but before they lived together, she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit. Her husband Joseph, being a righteous man and unwilling to expose her to public disgrace, planned to dismiss her quietly. But just when he had resolved to do this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will bear a son, and you are to name him Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.” All this took place to fulfill what had been spoken by the Lord through the prophet: “Look, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and they shall name him Emmanuel,” which means, “God is with us.” When Joseph awoke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him; he took her as his wife, but had no marital relations with her until she had borne a son; and he named him Jesus. Matthew 1:18-25
Well, it’s about time! Finally, we hear about Joseph. The Christmas story is almost always all about Mary. Our hymnal has only two hymns about poor Joseph. There is a third tune but only two different lyrics and we just sang one of them. Today is Joseph’s day.
Only in Lectionary Year A do we hear the story of the Annunciation from his viewpoint, giving us a glimpse of this man Joseph. We probably all have an image of him that we have created from the little we know from the scriptures. He was a carpenter, and it’s likely that he taught his skills to the young Jesus. He made the annual trip to Jerusalem at Passover, indicating that he was a just and faithful man. But in this passage from Matthew’s gospel, we learn something about Joseph’s relationship with God.
As the account goes, when the angel visited Joseph, he and Mary were already betrothed, or engaged to be married. This was no casual relationship. A Jewish betrothal was a contract between families that could be dissolved only if the man gave the woman a writ of divorce. According to Mosaic Law, Joseph had two options upon learning that his betrothed was pregnant. He could divorce her quietly, or he could expose her by bringing her before the court, where she would then be stoned to death. We learn that at first, Joseph’s plan was to divorce Mary quietly. He was obviously very much in love with her because he chose the honorable action, even though it meant giving up the woman he loved and letting go of his dream for their future.
Imagine for a moment how Joseph must have felt upon hearing that Mary was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit. Imagine his shock and disbelief that the future he had planned and looked forward to with the love of his life was now crashing down around him. Joseph surely felt helpless and hopeless.
I am moved by this version of the Annunciation because it is so real; so much like our own messy human lives. Like Joseph, we are trying hard to get by, struggling through life, and just when we think we have it all planned out, when everything is going well, WHAM! We are broad-sided by some unexpected event. How many times have we had the rug pulled out from under our feet, so to speak; had all our best-laid plans suddenly changed by circumstances beyond our control? When have we, like Joseph, been faced with situations where neither choice looked very good? Do we pause before making a decision, to see where God might be in the situation? Because God is in our midst, Immanuel - God with us, but do we know that?
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Note that in Joseph’s story God intervenes with Joseph’s plans, sending an angel to give him a third option. This third option was almost too absurd to consider! Marry her anyway? Raise the child as his own? Did he have the strength to do that? How would it look in the eyes of the community? The most amazing thing about all of this is that Joseph was obedient to God; he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him. The Latin root of the word obey really means “to listen to, to pay attention to.”
Being obedient means learning to listen to God and to those God sends into our lives. God continues to send prophets, angels, messengers to speak to us. They may be friends or strangers, loved ones, children, and even the people who get on our nerves! God also speaks to us in scripture, nature, and music; in prayer, worship, and daily circumstances. If we open our eyes, our ears, and our hearts, we will see God at work all around us in the Body of Christ. When we expect to see God, hope to see God, that is when we may realize that there can be a third option.
And yet, in all of our humanness, this can be hard. Our lives are interrupted with many unexpected things, causing us to fear and doubt the way forward. What we want is an angel of the Lord to appear and make things obvious! Life can become overwhelming when our plans are upended, and we can find no easy way out of our predicaments; when we cannot see beyond the loss and the grief. In our limited vision, at first all we can see are the obstacles to what comes next.
But what if those obstacles can help us to deepen our relationship with God? In the same way that God was with Joseph, in a circumstance that at first appeared all but impossible, outrageous even, God is with us. Immanuel is present in the seemingly impossible, wanting us to hear that new life is possible, even after unexpected challenges, failures, and loss. When we don’t always understand why things do not go as we planned, perhaps we can learn something from Joseph’s relationship with God. Surely he experienced many of the same challenges we face. Perhaps this example can help us.
Imagine you have spent time and resources planning the trip of your dreams. Let’s say, a fabulous vacation trip to Italy. You read all the guidebooks and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum, the art of Michelangelo and Botticelli, the gondolas in Venice. You may even learn some phrases in Italian. It’s all very exciting! After months of eager anticipation, you pack your bags and off you go. Hours later, the plane lands and the flight attendant says, “Welcome to Holland.”
“Holland?” you say, “what do you mean Holland? I signed up for Italy! I’m supposed to be in Italy. All my life I’ve dreamed of going to Italy.” But there’s been a change in the flight plans. The plane has landed in Holland and there you must stay for a time. It’s not what you planned or expected – it’s a different place.
So you must find some new guidebooks. You must learn a new language. And you will meet a new group of people you would never have otherwise met. It’s slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. After you’ve been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills, Holland has tulips, Holland has art by Van Gogh and Rembrandt. But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn’t get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special and lovely things about Holland.
Joseph’s relationship with God deepened and grew as he listened for the third option God offered him. William Willimon, preacher and pastor, says it very well, “This is often the way God loves us: with gifts we thought we didn’t need, which transform us into people we don’t necessarily want to be…he comes to us, blesses us with a gift, and calls us to see ourselves as we are – empty-handed recipients of a gracious God who, rather than leave us to our own devices, gave us a baby.”
Title Image: The Angel Visits Joseph, Mike Moyers
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